truly the life and lies of an inanimate flying object….. i got to improv and act with professional actors last night onstage with no warning? read on!!

ok. so ever heard of William Shakespeare? sure you have. he was one of the best and most famous play writer in the history of the world. (aside from the fact that he stole everything he wrote. so ignore that last statement—he was a good liar and a lousy play writer. idk.)

so i saw, in theatre (well, our theatre doesn’t count as a real theatre, but it was good anyway) “The complete works of William Shakespeare, Abridged.” it was three people, two men and a woman, (Chuck, Noami, and Carlos) doing every single one of Shakespeare’s plays condensed into two hours. yeah. it was amazing to say the least.


so here’s what happened to me:

i was sitting there while they were doing Hamlet. it was after the intermission. and they called me onto the stage to play a part.


yeah. seriously.

i was just sitting there and they guy said “we need with Ophelia—your help right there. in the green. with her hands over her mouth.” and the girl came down and dragged me onto the stage and i was shaking and everything. but then i got a hold of myself and thought ok, Haley, you’re onstage now, you can do this.

so they go on explaining what I'm going to be doing. Noami (yeah, it’s supposed to be that way. i think it’s cool. no-a-me.) told me my cue and said that when she says a line i have to scream. so when she said the cue… i (unintentionally) let out this little squeak.

ok so i meant it to be quiet, but not that quiet.

but everyone laughed, so that was good.

anyway, the “jerk” (who wasn’t really a jerk, just doing his part) Chuck started “criticizing” me… lol it was hilarious. i hammed it up, too. got all defensive, then smirked at him, and everything. (hey, i can be sarcastic)

anyway, at that point, Noami and Chuck started to tell the audience what they were going to be doing to get me to scream louder. they were going to symbolize everything going on inside my head. one person, this old bald guy, would run up and down the stage pretending to be my “insanity.” (haha. my insanity is an old guy.) the people in the front two rows were waving their hands saying “maybe, maybe not.” one third of the auditorium was saying “get the to a nunnery” (meaning get out of my life i hate you.) the next third said something (idk what) about me being ugly, and the third said “cut the crap, Hamlet. my biological clock is ticking and I want my babies NOW!” (haha. i turned my head away for that part…)

anyway. while they were all being taught their parts, Carlos (the guy who picked me to come up) was giving me a little bit of one on one coaching near the back half of the stage. how to scream loud, what i was supposed to feel in my body, what was going on inside my head etc… and i hadn’t told him that i’d had any experience.

so they lights went down, the old guy started running across the stage back and forth. i could hear voices…. lol the audience did a great job, too. then they pointed to me and said my cue, the lights all turned red, and i screamed as loud as i could, first pulling my head up then doubling over but not falling.

for those of you who don’t know… I'm loud. i could hear my voice bounce back onto the back wall and hit me again… weird feeling.

it was so much fun. I've never been able to scream as loud as i could. and that rocked :D

and i don’t think the actors were prepared for more than a scream, but it was SO MUCH FUN getting into that part.

haha. everyone thought i was a plant! an actor who was told to sit in the audience. probably because Chuck was, too. he started off in the second row. but he was so much of a ham within the first two minutes of just sitting there talking to the people, that i had my suspicions… anyway.

so that’s what happened to me.

those of you who can, go see the show! it was definitely not for anyone under the age of fourteen or fifteen, so don’t bring your young impressionable children or they may be scarred for life and pick up some not-so-pious habits or nasty language.

Sunday is the last day here in New Bern. students are only $5 a ticket. so go!!!!


love always,



Copyright 2016 Haley Mathiot. All reviews are 100% honest and unbiased. One or more items featured in the blog post may have been free or discounted. Receiving free or discounted product does not affect review. For more please see my disclaimer page.